How to Get Over First Baby Fears
I wish I had the definitive answer to this question, but considering how much time I have spent fearing writing another post on this blog, I think that I’ve arrived at the closest I’ll get to the definitive answer.
A baby is a living testament of love and commitment, not the ugly thing the Maury Show has made it out to be. So if you are like me, having a baby that is, you may be considering all of the ancillary fears surrounding what could and should be the greatest thing to ever happen in life.
And with this testament comes a lot of fear and self-assessment. Do you have enough health care? Have you saved enough money? Is your house safe enough? Will you be a good father?
Throughout my adulthood, I always knew that I wanted to have children. But I never guessed that having a baby would be such an anxiety-producer. Can’t sleep, can’t think straight, and am consumed with work and the money I can bring in. If I wanted my life to be like R. Kelly’s, I would’ve stayed single.
In the meantime, I have surprised myself with the outward appearance I give the world. I’m all smiles and confidence when people congratulate me on the baby. I constantly am reminded of how tired I’ll be when the baby gets here, how much fun it will be, and how joyful it is. And I believe all of that, but I also believe that this will be the most responsibility I’ve ever had in my life.
And it’s not a level of responsibility I can prepare for.
My life has been an exercise in flying by the seat of my pants, going with my instincts and praying for the best. But since I’ve been married, I’ve learned the value in preparation, focus and emotional work ethic. I can’t even classify this as fear, much more a searing uncertainty.
I’m sure I’ll be as fit for parenthood as I’ve been for any other role I’ve assumed in my life, but this will be the first time where someone else’s success or failure is so intimately tied with my own.
